QUESTIONS OF CALLING

unearthing beauty, mining meaning, and seeking truth

This is a place for anyone who wants more, who is not content to be comfortable, who seeks a life of truth and meaning, not just happiness.

Here, we ask hard questions, tell true stories, and turn life inside out to unearth the ragged beauty within.

I’m honored to have you to join me.

Learning to Doubt Without Fear
fear, faith, God Mara Eller fear, faith, God Mara Eller

Learning to Doubt Without Fear

When I started teaching teens at a Christian school a decade ago, I was baffled by how classroom discussion of controversial topics seemed to provoke panic among many parents.

What surprised me was not simply that parents objected to my choice of material but rather the terror that seemed to underlie their objections. It wasn’t rational. It wasn’t even theological. It was emotional: a nameless, faceless, gaping fear.

I’m still not sure what those parents were so afraid of, but I know it had something to do with their children learning to question their faith, to honestly consider other options and opinions . . .

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What About Mary? Ruminations on the Postpartum Journey of the Mother of God
postpartum, motherhood, God, Christmas, faith Mara Eller postpartum, motherhood, God, Christmas, faith Mara Eller

What About Mary? Ruminations on the Postpartum Journey of the Mother of God

My perspective on Christmas has changed dramatically after having a baby (or three). I still love it: the twinkle lights, the carols, the sense of hunkering down during the long, dark nights, the joy of Christmas morning gift giving. And of course, the reason for the season—the celebration of the miraculous incarnation of God in the form of a tiny, helpless human.

But having incubated, birthed, and cared for three tiny, helpless humans myself, I am acutely aware of Mary's experience in all this. The Christmas season, for me, has become intimately tied to the experience of late pregnancy (Advent), labor and delivery (Christmas Day), and postpartum motherhood (the other eleven days of the Christmas season leading up to Epiphany). And I can’t help but wonder: how did Mary fare those first weeks and months after she gave birth?

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The Annunciation: Mary’s Unexpected Calling
Christmas, calling, faith, God Mara Eller Christmas, calling, faith, God Mara Eller

The Annunciation: Mary’s Unexpected Calling

Do you ever wish that God would just tell you what to do with your life? That he would just announce your calling and eliminate all the confusion and struggle that usually accompanies that process of discernment?

I know I have.

But there's a mercy that comes with that process too. It allows us to adjust to that call slowly, to learn the skills and discipline required bit by bit, to gradually come to terms with the difference between what we thought our lives would look like and the reality in store for us and to begin to understand how that reality will ultimately surpass all our hopes and dreams even as it crushes many of them. . . .

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