The Life of a Showgirl

Poems

Below are all six poems with correct formatting and punctuation to match Taylor’s handwritten originals. You’ll also find an image of the originals (all six spliced together to form one longer poem) at the bottom of the page. Enjoy!

 Note: the poems were not titled in their original form, so I have not used any titles here apart from the numbers for each poem revealed by the starred letters in the original.

1

You wake up branded with the lines of pillow creases

     Thunderbolted tree roots across your cheek

In turn, last night's mascara stains

the ivory hotel pillowcase

Each one leaving their mark on the other

Looks like you're even.

You say ‘good morning’ to them when you walk in

and they don't correct you

As they spray vodka

on the armpits of the dancer's costumes

We learn these tricks along the way

The flesh toned bandage wrap

     Covered by skin colored fishnets

Because you will cover the wound,

No matter how deep it is

No one ever knew.

And, baby, that's show business for you.

2

Coffee. Stretch. Piano keys.

Vocal warm ups in a locker room shower.

Eyelash glue. A photo of him on the mirror.

Sweat and vanilla perfume

The cracking of joints

and the distant beat of a drum.

The curtain call.

The monotonous thrill of     it all.

Plan it out so it    doesn't    look planned

   10 different backup plans

If your red bottomed heel breaks

you will keep strutting

Balancing on the balls of your blistered feet

Know your exits. Shoulders back. Eyes up.

Hit your marks. Your winks. Sparks.

Tell them a story like it's an intimate dinner party

The looks on their   wondrous faces

Their expressions like mood rings

Isn't it all so majestic?

Of course it is

It's a lot of other things too

3

Remember this city?

You've been here before in another life

On another tour

Remember her?

She's got a mortgage now

Straight teeth where there'd

been metal brackets

Standing with her 8 year old daughter

You mouth ‘I know you’

In the millisecond gap in your choreography

To you, she will look exactly the same age

as when you first saw her

   She will always be 14 and a half

Remember!

   Lock right back into the footwork

Any missed step is a misstep

    You must remember everything

  But mostly this:

The crowd is your king

who has ruled over you for centuries  Benevolently

   For the most part.

4

Perhaps someday they will despise you again

   Perhaps it is not a matter of ‘if’

But ‘when’

They'll re-assess your merits and then

Take a magnifying glass to the shiny bug.

Deflate all the heroes they had decided she was.

And maybe they'll do it just because.

But you live by a strict code:

      Never believe your own mythology

  Never type your name into the search bar

      Let the wolves howl all they want

  The moon should never howl back

  You know if you play, it’s a losing game

So you keep yourself too busy to ever learn

what's-their-name's name

And these are the reasons

    you are still somewhat sane.

5

He ran to his car from work to catch the flight

Missed the first act but somehow

    it's better this way. It's just right.

Because you get to watch him make

his way through the masses

Parting the crowd like some neon Moses in a sequin sea

He is a magnet and a trampoline

      The tiny bubbles in champagne

Haphazard but precise, he crash-landed next to you

       Reckless, but never with your heart

   If he's in, you are too

   You've begun to feel that

   Every song before was just a prayer

A wish list

He is not what you've been waiting for

He is more.

   Why you held out

Why you left

      And nothing aches suddenly

   He has that effect.

6

  Tonight all these lives converge here

The mosaics of laughter and cocktails of tears

Where fraternal souls sing identical things

   And it's beautiful

It's rapturous.

It is frightening.

It's worth everything it has cost you

And even at your darkest or drunkest,

   You wouldn't say any different

   Would you?

You would choose all of it again

No matter how the story ends

With the ugliest boos or the loveliest bouquet

They say that love is a choice you make every

single

     day

  And that is how you love

          the life

             of

     A showgirl

If you want to learn how to apply some of Taylor’s best poetic techniques in your own writing — whether that’s fiction, nonfiction, or memoir — check out my 90-minute workshop Write Like Taylor Swift.